Blindspots

I'm looking forward to exams. HAHA. Weird man. I think i'm looking forward to the holidays, which is right after exams, and looking forward to getting over and done with the presentations, which will be before the exams. Don't make sense? I juz woke up:)

I know i'm forgiven for the past angry week, and its going to be difficult for the next week. Loving your neighbour has never become so difficult and real.

Had great times meeting up and chilling with people. Nice chat with Aud, and chilling with Don and Aud, Rufus and Marshall at Crazy Elephant. Deaf after that. LOUD is GOOD.:p Youthphoria at the beach was excellant, and time at Vivo after that was so precious. Can't wait for Kel to be back on wed!!

Blindspots. Oh yea. What a nuisance. I forgot about them after driving school. Who likes checking blind spots? After all, I think I have a good view of everything already. And that I'm in the right anyway. 'Maybe that bike should think twice about about staying on my side.' 'WHY SHOULD I CHECK?' He's the one at the losing end. I'm not going to care. Or maybe its that irritating car over there. 'He's behind me, so he should look out'. What happens in the end? People get hurt. At least one party; usually both. All in the name of selfishness, pride and not understanding the other party.

I know i get angry with God because I don't understand Him sometimes. But from now on i'll make a choice to not flare up and blame Him when I can't even see my own blindspots. I know that there MUST be something which I don't understand right now, but when I finally do, I'll be so thankful for what God's doing, and i'll slap myself for being pissed off. And the same for people. I know that so many times, it's my own blindspots of selfishness, expectations, unappreciation and taking others for granted, and letting my mind play tricks on me, that I so easily come up with my own conclusions and start the anger party. And sometimes people get hurt.

Won't there be less misunderstandings and anger and conflicts if everyone check their blindspots regularly? How peaceful the world will be; if the Talibans understood us. Or we understood them. OKAY OUT OF POINT. Hmmmm but you get the idea. And I'm so gonna be checking my blindspots too. Time to start preventing 'accidents' because of my rashness and selfishness. In fact I'll be thanking God for everyone He's made wonderfully; that we're different. That we all don't 'drive' like exactly the same style, but we have different habits, whether good or not. But I know that checking blindspots will almost be a cure for disappointment as well, because love sets in and we react with the Fruits of the Spirit instead of devilish behaviours.

Looking at the things you don't normally see; what a better place the world will be.

I thank God for Maverick, because of the joy he brings to those around. SO CUUUTE. Hahaha. God bless ya'll and wish you Jesus for a new week!

Tears of Anger

Take my disappointment.

You're all I want Jesus.

In Your Time

I lashed out today. In anger. At a non-christian classmate. In front of a class of..random people. Talk about living sacrifice huh?

Tired of worrying and fearing. Back to square 1 of surrendering, trusting, and claiming His promises. Everything in His time.

If i were one of the Koreans, I hope I can still sing 'Lord I'm amazed by You'. Even now, its hard sometimes. Keep praying:) We'll be amazed by His plan, no matter what happens to them. In His time.

All Your Promises Won't Let Go of Me

Wendy lagging sia...HA. Yup that was during youth sunday eve. What a night. We just couldn't stop..could have gotten a parking ticket for that. Wished more could be there like Kel, AhXui, Rufus, Don and Aud etc. Question: Who's the one taking the photos?! Guess! Actually quite obvious huh. Who else does this man...

Youth Sunday was nice, and Eric and Min did great! SO did everyone else, and I didn't get a youth sunday hangover, but more of a...CHURCH ppl hangover. Love youthphoria so much.

Fear. Yea it comes and goes. I know fear=not trusting in the goodness of God; forgetting He's good all e time and all His promises. I fear of future challenges; or when He gives something only to cruelly take it back; or where i'll end up; or bad news.

Thats the feeling. The truth? God's good. All e time. Simple, yet simple to forget too. But the truth is, God's good all e time, even when it dosen't seem like it. The Devil seems like the good guy sometimes huh? He'll win Oscars for his acting. Too bad can't get past God. Too bad for him.

Busybusy. Yet He's still by our side, even when we don't care. Indescribable. I wanna call it painful love. And lets make it wonderful for Him by accepting that love.

Lord we accept Your love; love which we don't deserve at all. We feel guilty for not giving back enough to You; we don't feel good enough for You. We always try harder for You, but fail so many times. Father teach us that all You want is us; not someone trying to be something else; not someone trying to hide our fears and failures and weaknesses. You want us just as we are; not anything more or less. Thank you for looking at our hearts and not outward appearance. We wanna love You, ourself and others authentically. Amen.

Hold me now in Your arms, and never let me go.

Pursuit of Happiness

Just watched it. Can cry man. Inspiring! Coz the 'loser' part and 'hopeless' part looked so much like myself. And the future is scary. I look at the week ahead. It's scary. I look at the month of July. Scary. I think of what my future will be like, with what little i possess. How scary.

There's this part where father and son was on the beach, faraway from everything else..the job, bills, rent-chaser, PAIN..none of these could touch them. Aw how i wished, at that moment, I could be there with Jesus. Nothing could touch us. Forever. Just me and Him. Soon!

Quit dreaming.

As for now, i still have work to do.

It's when you've been stripped off everything and left in utter loneliness, that you become more thankful of what's left.

Rubik's Cube the other star in pursuit of happiness. Yea..reminder He's doing something in my life. And yours too:)

You Alone

Just played soccer with my classmates, and ended with a sprain! Became more of a spectator. And if you happen to feel guilty when hanging out with slackers (which is weird), let me console you abit by telling you that we can really learn how to take life easy from those guys. Many of us are too HURRIED, which feeds our loneliness actually. Yay something I learnt this week.

Yea i've been a nasty person this week. Like becoming the venom side of spiderman, and I don't know why. God still loves me:)

Yup i guess we gotta have the distance and rely on God and everything, but i guess some encouragement could help. You've felt it before, and i guess it's not a very nice position to be in isn't it. Or maybe I really am not relying on God enough. I don't know.:(

Time to go for lecture. Have 10 cards to tap; i guess there's stiill a hint of guainess eh. Bye.

Pissed

At last, we finally started DG! Yong Liang and Chris are great; thank God! It was a nice time:)

Came home, showered, went for time of prayer(fasting), fell asleep coz was so tired and got up angry. And i don't even know why. Angry with God again. Just so sudden! So moody suddenly; male pms i reckon. Maybe one reason's coz i still am so poor at hearing His voice, that i get frustrated. And i start to think: God why are You so petty and childish? If wanna tell me something, just speak lar!

Look who's the petty one.

But it's tough sometimes, when you get mixed signals from God. Don't even know if it's Him. Well i'll learn. Guess busy weeks are anger management tests.

Feel like jioing ppl out for supper tonight; the work is infinite, but my energy isn't. I can't work all the time man. With a slack project group not doing anything, i feel like giving up too man.

Take heart.